Moments of really missing my Dad come out of no where. The surprise of it sometimes takes my breath away. For me, the last time was 3am this morning. I woke up out of a dream and with no recognized reason a picture of my dad popped in my head. Then, of course, I couldn’t sleep. I took the time to go through years and years of memories, some happy, some sad. Somehow by repeating these memories in my mind I can keep him alive or at least his memory alive.
My dad could really not be compared to Superman, Batman, Spiderman or Captain America. Though I know he had some heroic moments in his life, the real truth is he was a lost boy. Peter Pan. The sad thing is I learned very little of his childhood. I lost him when I was practically a child, though technically a young adult, I didn’t think of all the things I may want to ask. He rarely spoke of his mother and even less of his father, they both passed away when he was in his teens.
He was a genuine lost soul and never grew up. A kid at heart, he created many memories for me that were fun and adventurous. As an adult I was frustrated with his lack of accountability and responsibility, but I learned to forgive him. He did genuinely love my brother and I and was so proud of us I could see it in his eyes. We were the best things he ever did in his life.
It’s weird the things you miss about those in your life that have passed on. I would give anything to hear him snort with laughter – he always grabbed his nose when he laughed. He also always chewed with his mouth open!!! Gross dad. He had the most awesome sense of humor and filled moments with silliness that I appreciate more as an adult than I did as a teenager.
It will be twelve years next month that he left this earth. I kind of like the thought of him leading a pack of lost boys through the trails of adventures. I bet he found the best walking stick ever. Maybe he found his mother.
choosejoyandlove 
Sarah, I, too had many fun times with your dad! He was the best “playmate” anyone could have asked for! I met him the night I moved to Dallas, November 6, 1969, and always felt that I grew up with him. You are correct, Pat never really grew up, and that is probably why our marriage did not last.
I didn’t know much about his parents, as he rarely talked about them. I didn’t realize when we were young that losing both of his parents by age 17 was most likely the reason your dad did not handle reality and responsibility so well. I miss him and wish I had been a better friend after our divorce.
I’ve always believed that he is in the presence of angels and looks out for his children and myself from the heavens still.
Chewed with his mouth open! Haha! I was always after you kids to chew with your mouths closed! Your dad’s influence was far greater than mine at times!
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Your dad was an absolute blast (and very easy on the eyes-lol)…when you kids were little we would hang out at your house every weekend and just hang (watch Dallas), play cards, listen to Styx and get totally SILLY! During those years it was such good, fun and happy times! Your mom is right on I would say…your dad is watching over you and yours, of that I am sure…AND I am a firm believer that when you dream about your dad, he is there with you…his spirit…so embrace it, he is with you ALWAYS!
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